Help for the Abused
Those who have been abused need a safe place to turn to for help. Anyone can be abused, it doesn’t matter what sex you are, what gender you identify as, who you are or where you come from. We’re all human and when we hurt we need to be treated like a person, we need a loving, welcoming environment to nurse us back to health.
Many abuse resources on the internet will not provide this kind of sanctuary. They may paint themselves as a safe place, but they are wrapped in a blanket of bias.
Abuse is Gender Neutral
Abuse is gender neutral, consider avoiding any organization that uses gender specific pronouns or discriminatory language in their literature. The people you turn to for support should be welcoming, free of bias and supportive.
If an organization uses the Duluth Power and Control wheel they cannot claim to provide gender neutral support. This abuse model is designed specifically for women who have been abused by men. It is a model that belittles the abuse of men by claiming they are minimally affected by the abuse of women. This philosophy is sexist, a determent to equality and encourages the myth that men do not feel.
“On the societal level, women’s violence against men has a trivial effect on men compared to the devastating effect of men’s violence against women.” http://theduluthmodel.org/training/wheels.html
I’ve been abused by several women in my life and it has caused irrevocable emotional damage to me. I have been abused by men and it has caused an equal amount of damage. Abuse is abuse, whether by a man or a woman. It is abuse whether to a man or a woman. We all feel, we all have emotions, we all cry and we all are haunted by the terrible things that have been done to us.
Any group that trivializes the abuse of anyone is deplorable.
It can be advantageous to create strategies that target specific kinds of abuse. However, those advantages end when these strategies alienate an entire population.
To end abuse, we need to use critical awareness, overcome bias and realize that everyone can abuse and be abused.
If we made the Duluth Power and Control wheel gender neutral it would become a resource that anyone could benefit from. It would be even more valuable if it spoke directly to the reader.
Using Emotional Abuse
- “putting her down” would become “putting you down“
- “Making her feel bad about herself” becomes “Making you feel bad about yourself“
Resources to end Abuse, Neglect and Exploitation
These links mainly focus on the disabled or elderly. They might not match everyone’s situation, but perhaps it will help someone get the help they need.
I hope that if you are facing abuse you’re able to find a safe haven for your heart. A place saturated with love, life and harmony.
If you would like to continue the through through self advocacy, feel free to click on one of these links.