When our emotions are running around all wild and such they tend to do some pretty terrible things. They create something I call malfunctions. They are what happen when we let our emotions influence how our thoughts process information. When this occurs we take action that conflicts with what a rational person would do or understand.
- When we idle we spin.
- When we spin we repeat ourselves
- When we repeat ourselves we malfunction
- When we malfunction we hurt
In the moments we are spinning our world doesn’t make any sense. As it spins we try to solve the problem, we think and feel our way through it. Then as we try to fix, we malfunction. When this happens, we try to do something to alleviate ourselves of the pain. But it never works and we hurt. We really hurt.
Then it starts again, until we can break the pattern.
The manifestation of a malfunction could appear like this:
“I’m tired of her pestering me about the bananas. If she wanted to have them that much she should have ordered them herself. If she wants those damn bananas, I’m going to really let her have those bananas. See how she feels. Let her feel how I feel.”
This person does something to the bananas. For a moment, it gives them pleasure. They feel power over the lady. We hope they can catch themselves before they give the bananas to her. If they do then they will prevent the cycle from beginning again. Most of us don’t catch ourselves and we begin to spiral.