Mistakes and Fairness

Mistakes and Fairness

Should the sum of our existence be calculated by a small window of time or a few mistakes? Do you believe every good deed ought to be dismissed because of a few decisions?

We all make mistakes and decisions that lead to disaster. No one was given an instruction manual or granted a good guide. Each and everyone of us are bumbling through life for the first time.

If we want fairness we must be fair to others. We achieve this by forming a relationship with Forgiveness, Wisdom and Hope. Forgiveness helps us ease the ferocity of vengeance; Wisdom, especially empathy mutes the sharp edge of judgement; and Hope reminds us we can learn from our mistakes.

Pain can blind us

The world is an insane place and there seems to be no end in sight. It spins us round and round, twisting our gut till we are about to throw up. With the challenge of life, you’d think we’d be more understanding, but people hurt so much they are blinded by their pain.

We get kicked over and over even after being knocked to our knees. When the assault stops we are granted a reprieve, but we must raise our fists for the next beating. With so much strife it becomes hard to fight. Its difficult to give a pass when we feel like shattered glass.

I know how much it hurts to feel broken, but we cannot close our eyes. If we do, we lose more than magnificent beauty and infinite wonder. We lose our empathy and ability to see. We must hold onto our wisdom and continue to use empathy. The more empathetic and understanding we are, the more forgiving the world will be.

Forgiveness is not Forgetfulness

Forgiveness is a spiritual experience and a relationship with our inside zones. It’s a philosophy of responsibly letting go. A decision to walk away from suffering to come closer to peace. It’s a path of personal protection and a barrier against bitterness.

Its important to know Forgiveness is not forgetfulness. If someone violates, hurts or wrongs us, we should protect ourselves. Do what needs to be done, but don’t desire their destruction. Stop the cycle of bad by treating them better than they treated us. Let our abusers see how they hurt us and give them a chance grow from it.

Vengeance is easy, but imagine what kind of life we would be living if someone enacted vengeance on us for every wrong or crime we committed?

My message here is to be fair to others. Do to them as we want done to us. Be understanding while protecting ourselves. If we must protect ourselves, our goal should be to end the threat and receive fair compensation.

I know what it feels like to feel pain, it can be terrible, but making someone else hurt isn’t going to take away ours. When we strip vengeance from justice we can give Forgiveness and live with peace.

We can learn from our mistakes

At the end of the day I believe everyone can learn from their mistakes. Every day I take a misstep, sometimes I stumble, and if I fall I hope someone is rooting for me to get back up. We all make mistakes and decisions that lead to disaster, everyone has hurt someone else, and no one is perfect. Have faith that others can become the better version of themselves.

 

Hold onto the light

Second Opinion – Personal Advocacy

second opinion

Second Opinion

You should always get a second opinion.  They say that opinions are like wiggly toes, some people seem to wiggle their toes more often than others.  Doctors just have really big wiggly toes, so when they move them about, we seem to notice and remember them more.  They also went to school to learn how to wiggle their toes, they are experts in the act of toe wiggling, some even see them as toe wiggling gods.

Toe wiggling and opinions are similar in that most everyone has the ability to wiggle their toes, if not toes then perhaps their nose.  What I know is that they call it a second opinion because everything your doctor just told you was his or her opinion.  Doctors are people, they’re human and during the course of their practice they make mistakes.  It’s important when we make mistakes that we learn from them, since doctors are still practicing they are constantly making mistakes, learning and becoming better healers.  By getting a second opinion you can reduce the chance that you become one of your doctor’s mistakes.  His mistakes may make him a better healer, but surely it will impair your quality of life.

Your Opinion

More than a second opinion, what is your opinion?  You have one, just like all the wiggly toes.  Sure your opinion might not be rooted in your doctor’s reality, but that’s fine, the only reality you can know is your own.  After all is said and done it is you and not the doctor who has to deal with the effects of his treatment plan.

In the quest for personal advocacy your opinion is the most important.  It is more valuable than a first or second opinion, it is more important than your spouse’s, your children’s or anyone else’s thoughts about what you should do.  You and you alone must make all of the sacrifices, everyone else can bow out at anytime.

The importance of acknowledging your opinion is that it does two things.  One, it reminds you that your opinion, thoughts and feelings matter.  Two, it ensures that you have made your decision with informed consent.  The last thing you want in this process is buyer’s remorse, especially when it comes to your life.

Links

If you would like to continue the journey of discovering personal advocacy feel free to click on any of these links.

Fight Abuse

Introduction to Boundaries

Cancer

Power Advocacy 3